You Selected: I’m afraid to start ERP — it feels too daunting

We’ve pulled together reflections, research, and ideas that speak directly to this challenge. You can bring these into therapy, reflect on them, or just take a moment to know you’re not alone.

What Others Said

These are real words from people who’ve felt the same fear around starting ERP. These quotes come from a study of over 100 personal OCD stories:

“I was reading about ERP and what it would require of me… to face my fears head-on. I was like, that is crazy. I'm never going to do that.”
— The OCD Stories podcast, March 2020

“I Googled ERP and found all these horror stories. I thought, no, no way… I stayed off it completely.”
— May 2020

What the Research Says

This fear of starting ERP — or feeling stuck before even beginning — was echoed in multiple OCD studies. Researchers (Millar et al., 2020; Marsden et al., 2018) found that ERP hesitation is often driven by fear of emotional overwhelm, misunderstanding what the therapy involves, or hearing scary second-hand stories. This study also found that overly rigid therapy can make people feel even more stuck.

Baird (2020) suggests that this hesitation isn’t “resistance” — it’s valuable information. It shows us how someone relates to fear, and it can be explored in therapy to build trust and readiness.

What You Might Bring to Therapy

Ideas you could explore with your therapist:

  • Ask if you can go at a slower pace to begin with — one exposure just to try it out.

  • Discuss any doubts or fears you’ve heard online. A good therapist will help demystify the process.

  • Ask if they can show you a sample hierarchy, so you can see how exposure can be adapted to your needs.

  • Consider framing exposures in a values-based way (e.g. “This is about doing what matters to me, not suffering for no reason”).

Helpful Resources

If you’d like to explore more:

  • 🎧 [Podcast] ERP felt impossible at first – The OCD Stories

  • 📘 [Book] Freedom from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder – Jonathan Grayson

  • 📹 [Video] ERP explained gently – Made of Millions

  • 🔍 [Article] What is ERP, really? – Intrusivethoughts.org